The emergency department is an unusual place, a place called in the hospital, a place open the City. A form of intersection hospital. A place like a scene. A scene in which the curtain never closes. A scene where three shots rang incessantly. It is packed with extras, actors in spite of themselves. Actors who never repeat, and yet the tragedy repeated indefinitely, the same scenes of life, the challenge of destiny. Daily tragedies, human. But where did Dr. House? I did not see. is 18.36. A quarter of an hour break. I pass the glass doors and breathe some fresh air. Finally, I drink my coffee from 13.30. It was cold, I did warm . Yuck, I do not like reheated coffee, but this one, it's delicious. The cigarette that goes with it, makes me dizzy. (Mr Snake, do not give me a lecture, j'ai rendez vous en addicto, juste après l'obtention de mon DE. ) Je suis claquée. 58 entrées en 5h. Je suis toute molle tout d'un coup. Je m'assois sur un rebord de misère un peu crado, avec un espèce de cendrier de misère lui aussi, tout aussi crado, où se mêlent gobelets en plastique, papiers de bonbons, paquets vides de chips et autres madeleines à deux euros les six. L'endroit est tout simplement merveilleux. Je pense 5 minutes à mon chéri, qui n'est plus mon chéri, mais toujours mon chéri. Rien, un instant de nostalgie. J'observe mon reflet dans la vitre d'en face. Mes cheveux sont un peu en bataille, ma tenue plus aussi impeccable. Des cernes de fatigue weigh down my face but I am deeply proud to be there. I'm in my element.
18.53, I got up, threw my cup, and returns the glass doors in the other direction. Here we go again! Head to the grindstone. Five new people in the room "sort". All the infusion, the bilanter, the Constanta, ask the 1st diagnosis, assess, reassure them, monitor them and direct them to the radio, scan, or "déchoc" ... But it's not as simple. Such, in a vomit bag, hello Dr. to add an anti emetic, such is not calmed by the prescribed painkiller, hello to Dr. morphine titration. This means absolutely have to go to reassure his wife waiting in the waiting room. Another restless, another desaturates, electro Mr Heart shows several extrasystoles which may well go on fibrillation! No, nothing is simple here! At any moment everything can go on a lollipop! My level of alertness is at its peak times, the adrenaline is not only in p'tites bulbs, but now flowing in my veins at full speed.
Let me tell you that when I'm out of here, the car returns home alone. I'm drained. But so pleased to have participated in "saving lives" ... And that, in his job, it's great. That balancing. I spontaneously into perspective on my little daily troubles ... When I am there, I forget almost everything, I'm catching up later, then it wilts again as soon as I put on my outfit ...
Well, now, after two months of training here, I know that's where I want to work. There, in front in the agitation, the risk spills. I am firmly set in my "fang's red." My skills have been recognized, both human and technical and theoretical. Full speed ahead!
Monday, I attack my last course (psychiatry, closed area). It is there that I spend mon diplôme d'Etat. Trois ans et demi d'études sous pression continue ou presque. Trois ans et demi d'une vie agitée, bouleversée, mais bien remplie. Un grand merci à tous les gens qui m'entourent et m'accompagnent.
Quelqu'un veut il que je le perfuse ?
Et mon pull ? Toujours à l'envers... Mais doux et chaud.
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